Tips for being a good supervisee

Supervision is a two way street with most of the traffic going toward the employee. But, here are some things that  make for an “easy supervision”. Otherwise known as: “ways you can be

easier to supervise.” As an employee you have certain needs and expectations of the person who supervises you that may be met all the time, some of the time or not as much as you need. You have some responsibility for this relationship and living up to those can facilitate the supervision and

support available to you as an employee.

In clinical supervision, it can be difficult to distinguish between your boss trying help you be better social worker, supporting you helping a client and trying to support you as an agency employee. Those are not the same thing. Let me repeat, those are not the same thing.Some agencies even recognize this by having your job supervisor and your clinic supervisor be different people.

Take time to meet with your boss to talk specifically about supervision. Be as clear as you can about your needs and expectations. Without being pesky, you can clarify things about yourself that will make your supervisor’s job a lot easier. Let her/him know how you respond best to

communication – we’re all a little different. Some of us would like to be told things and prefer person-to-person communication. A surprising number of us are just fine with email and texts and can have entire meaningful conversations in that context. Many of us are a little touchy about written

communications, we like compliments however they come (including written), but we prefer to get criticism or correction in person. Some of us are assertive and proactive about seeking out our boss’ time and attention while others are more reserved and would like to be approached regularly. Some of us want a great deal of autonomy about day-to-day work, and others would prefer to check in around details. Don't make your boss guess. Just tell her/him what's worked for you in the past.

Ask your boss how she/he likes to hear from you. Are they overwhelmed with phone messages and need you to send an email about time-sensitive issues? Will they be checking in with you about routine issues? What information would she/he like you to bring to supervision meetings? In a new relationship with a boss I keep a notepad handy with notes about questions or issues that have arisen for me since the last time we met.

Your boss will undoubtedly tell you to do things. Bosses can be tricky about that because it’s not as comfortable to order people around as it may seem. Learn what it means when your boss asks you if you’ll do something. Most of the time they’re not just asking because they’re interested. They’re asking because they want you to do it. Practice saying yes when your boss asks you to do something. When your boss tells you to do something and directly delegates the task, accept it with some grace and ask good questions about where, when, who and how.

Some bosses will check to make sure you’ve done something they ask you to. It can feel a little like they don’t trust you, but it’s generally just a style issue. If you have this type of boss, they’ll love it if you get in the habit of letting them know when you’ve completed things so that they don’t have to seek you out to have that peace of mind.

Some bosses will never check to make sure you’ve done something. That can in turn feel like they didn’t really care about it in the first place. Generally that’s not true, it’s another style. If you have this type of boss you can comfort yourself by reporting on what you’ve done in supervision or otherwise. But never let that kind of style make you a slacker who doesn’t follow through – it will reflect really badly on you in the long run because eventually you will get caught short.

Tell your boss what you like and don’t like about your job. Explain things that are going well and things that present you with challenges. Let your boss know if you’re tired, sad, burned-out or frustrated. It’s hard for bosses when you just start to cry about something.

Earn your boss’s trust. Just because someone hires you, doesn’t mean they trust you. You will have to earn that trust through clear communication, reliability, a willingness to learn, asking good

questions and good old-fashioned hard work.

So many of us come into this relationship and place all the responsibility for our training, work, our work environment and our job satisfaction in our boss’s lap. Not fair. When you were hired, your boss may have really liked many of your attributes and be very excited about the potential of your

relationship. But you have work to do to provide depth and learn the job as it is. When we approach supervision with a lot of suspicion and challenges to our boss, we are undermining our own ability to grow into our jobs and earn her/his trust.

Identify the times that you need your boss to help you solve problems and make decisions and the times that you can do it yourself. That changes over time from beginning with a lot of support to evolving to little. Use your judgement constantly to test the waters and know how much leeway you have earned. In the process, learn what kinds of problems your boss likes to solve and let her/him have those or share in those.

Use your supervision time well. Respect your boss’s time and energy. Pay attention to times when your boss is busy, tired, overwhelmed or on a deadline and adjust your demands accordingly. Three hours before a deadline, if you need to vent, maybe you can find another outlet – or at least ask before you launch off. Don’t assume that your needs superceded whatever your boss is doing at a given moment.

Take care of your boss. Caring is a two way street, for sure. If you see a disaster heading your boss' way, or think they are about to make a mistake, find a way to let them know. If you know that someone may be about to file a grievance or complaint, let your boss know. If your boss has done something well, let them know. If you see that they are struggling with something, time, energy, paperwork, whatever, offer to help even if you know you can’t. If your boss has helped you, let them

know. It all makes a world of difference.

When you are annoyed with your boss (oh come on, we all know it happens), be thoughtful about your reaction. If you’re the type to retreat, give yourself a time limit for that behavior – don’t let it drag on. If you’re the type to be confrontational and direct, pick your battles very carefully. If you’re the sensitive type and get your feelings hurt easily, give yourself a time limit for that – and stash some chocolate or something somewhere for quick cheer-ups. If you’re the type to over-achieve and ‘prove ‘em wrong darn it’ take care not to fry yourself trying. Always be sure to talk to your boss about things that annoy you when you are rested, calm and clear-headed. If you can wait until you

are no longer feeling defensive and argumentative, that’ll help you. Bosses can deal with questions and explanations better than they can with anger.

If you know that your relationship with your boss isn’t working it’s understandable to wait and see what happens, but not very helpful. For all you know your boss may be trying things to improve the

relationship in ways that are having a terrible effect that you haven’t told her/him about. Step up, identify and clarify your needs, talk through problems. If nothing works, don’t just be miserable. Talk to your boss’s supervisor.

Do unto Bosses as you’d have Bosses do unto you.

The best gifts you can give your boss: discretion, loyalty, dependability, your

best work, space to be themselves, permission not to meet your needs every

minute